Sometimes when we’re learning languages, we feel the FOMO. The Fear Of Missing Out. That little niggle that we should be doing something else, learning another language or using another resource. That feeling that we’re missing out on a big important thing and our language learning time would be better spent elsewhere.

When that FOMO hits, it can stall our overall language progress. Which, you know, isn’t what we’re going for. So, let’s take a look at what can be done to avoid language FOMO in the first place and overcome it when it happens.

Satisfy That Itch

It’s worth first of all, having some time and space carved out for exploring other languages or ‘dabbling’, as I like to call it. 

Just a little time here and there where you allow yourself to learn the basics of Hungarian when you’re learning Japanese, watch or listen to something in Korean when you’re learning French, or take a lesson in Arabic instead of the Turkish you’re focused on lately.

Giving yourself this ‘allocated freedom’ (I know, it sounds almost like an oxymoron!) can go a long way to avoiding language FOMO in the first place.

How to do it

You know yourself better than I do. So if your FOMO is coming from different languages, consider how often a little ‘allocated freedom’ you think would satisfy that curiosity.

Also consider what you think would make you happy here and ease the FOMO. Is it full on Norwegian lessons for a whole week? Is it a weekend exploring with a Quechua book you’ve already got on the shelf? Or is it simply an evening watching that 5 star German film you’ve heard oh-so-much about?

Don’t be afraid to experiment with this too. The what and the how often are always open to flexibility here. 

Minimise Your Language Resources

Adopting a minimal approach to resources you use on the regular to learn a language can really help.

If we become a bit of a magpie and hoard each and every resource we find, we may aim to use them all, but it can be hard in practice. 

And when we’re sat on a pile of course books, app subscriptions, and PDF downloads, it can make us feel the FOMO when we’re attempting to focus in and learn a language with one at a time.

It’s that feeling of “Is this the best use of my time? Is there a better resource out there for me?”. And that can slow down and distract even the most dedicated language learner.

How to do it

So, what to do? From the start, limit your resources. Be minimal with what you choose to use. 

Accept that yes, there may be better resources out there, but also accept that you can’t use them all, so you don’t need to try to do so.

Consider who you’re trying to impress by using all the resources. Is it someone else? Is it yourself? Set those expectations aside and get minimal with your resources. 

When you feel the FOMO creep in, remind yourself that it’s less about what resource you use to learn a language, and more so about how you use it. 

This is why learning how to learn a language, and in particular how to use any resource for language learning is such a crucial part of the process (and why we cover this lots in Language Life!)

Feel the FOMO and Wonder Why

It’s not just about ignoring the feeling of FOMO. Often we can use our feelings as indicators for change. 

So if we’re feeling language FOMO, does this mean we need to switch the language we’re learning? Does it mean we need to adjust our resources and routine? Does it mean we should change who we’re learning with?

Use the feeling of FOMO as an indicator for change. Get curious, not judgemental with yourself and ask what this can teach you about where you’re at when you’re feeling it.

How to do it

One of the most useful skills for language learning (and, to be fair, for life in general) is to be able to step aside from your emotions and observe yourself. 

To watch how you’re doing your language learning as an external observer is a worthy skill to develop (well, as external as you can be given that you can’t actually leave your own body).

It’s not always easy at first, but it’s about being able to detach yourself from the FOMO and curiously question why you might feel that way, observing the whole situation rather than trying to be impartial whilst feeling all the FOMO itself at the same time. 

If you struggle with this, keep going. It’s not always something that comes instantly. And you might find that meditation helps to get good at sitting with feelings. This can help in becoming more observant to them, rather than reacting and letting them control you. 

Look for the JOMO

Wikipedia assures me there’s a whole host of FOMO spin-off acronyms. It’s quite the list. 

But a real stand out for me (especially as someone who’d much rather spend a cosy night in than be out til 3am) is JOMO: the Joy Of Missing Out.

Chances are, there’s lots of joy to be found in the things that you initially might perceive as stuff you’re “missing out” on. There’s always a positive way to spin it! 

Switching FOMO to JOMO is a great help to avoid falling into the trap of eternal language FOMO.

How to do it

This definitely isn’t about ignoring any feelings of FOMO and trying to squash them down hoping they really mean nothing.

Instead, it’s about recognising that yes, you feel that, you’re asking why. But in the meantime, you’re also acknowledging the joy to be found with your current status.

Because chances are there’s lots. 

Start by making a list of all the things you love about your language learning right now. Is it the moments on Duolingo with your morning cup of tea? Is it understanding a stranger’s conversation in the street? Perhaps it’s your weekly session with your favourite tutor?

Now consider all the things that you’ve felt FOMO about. Write them down. And it’s time to flip those on their heads! 

For example, you wonder if you should be learning Spanish as everyone you meet seems to speak it, but you’re knee deep in Portuguese and actually really loving it. Well, that FOMO for not knowing or learning Spanish can be countered by the joy (JOMO) of knowing and learning a language that less people know.

Let’s say you’re feeling FOMO for that Korean textbook you’ve seen all over Instagram, and your main resource is an online course and podcast feed. The JOMO there is that you’re saving money, and you can enjoy your resources on the go anywhere you like! 

Question the Fear

We’ve already talked about wondering why we’re feeling FOMO, but here, I’m being more specific. Actually question the FEAR part of the language FOMO you’re feeling.

What is it that you’re fearful of? 

What’s the worst that could happen if you don’t use that Korean textbook? If you don’t learn Spanish because you’re learning Portuguese? If you don’t attempt to use all the resources that you’ve hoarded and downloaded?

Because chances are, if you know how to learn a language and you’re putting in the time and effort, that you will succeed at this. 

Fear is a worthy feeling. It’s there to keep us safe if we’re walking down a dark eery street or if a barking dog approaches us. But a lot of the time, with Fear Of Missing Out, the potential consequences of missing out are actually nothing to be fearful of.

How to do it

This isn’t about learning how to never ever feel fear ever again. We want fear, we need fear. Like we’ve said, it’s a worthy feeling. 

Instead, it’s about questioning if the fear in your language FOMO is founded or unfounded. Is there a legitimate reason to be fearful?

Again, this is about getting really comfortable with that observer role, trying to observe our emotions and feelings rather than get so caught up in them that we respond with our emotions only rather than rational thought. 

First, ask yourself what you’re really fearful of and what the worst case scenarios are with that. Then, it can be fun to consider the best case scenarios too.